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Archive for August, 2010

Sorry, I’m busy fighting Fear!

Fear. It’s something we all hear about, and often we feel. That feeling of impeding danger; like something bad is going to happen.

For someone living with Anxiety, this fear is constant; fearing possible futures seems to become almost a way of life. It’s frustrating, incapacitating, and can be depressing. If the Anxiety gets too much, one can feel physically ill and can even have Panic Attacks. Once the anxious situation is over with, one often feels drained of energy- because most of it was used feeling anxious.

Fighting Anxiety can be hard to do, but there are ways. Methods like Cognitive Behavioural Therapy take time but can work. There aren’t really any “quick fixes”, but there are ways to temporarily ‘tone down’ that anxious feeling. One I constantly use is the breathing technique. Most people use this. Basically you take deep breaths through the nose, then let it out again slowly through the mouth. Sometimes, I also count backwards and/ or distract myself from whatever is making me anxious by concentrating on things that make me feel calm and happy.

I’ve found, however, that when I do this I like to be alone because it is hard to concentrate on calming oneself if you’ve got to concentrate on something else too. There’s been a few times when I’ve been trying to breathe myself to tranquility and lost track of the conversation I was trying to have with someone at the same time. ‘Sorry, I wasn’t listening. I was busy fighting Fear!’ :/ Of course, having a conversation with someone could help distract one from their Anxiety, but on those occasions the conversations were on whatever was making me anxious at the time, so I didn’t really feel up to talking about it.

Recently, I’ve been writing down goals I want to achieve in my life. Naturally, overcoming my Anxiety is one. Unfortunately, the barriers to me achieving all my other goals always include Anxiety so it’s something I must work on beating. There is no actual cure to Anxiety (and some Anxiety is actually good for you), but there are ways to learn to live with it to an extent that it no longer poses as much of a problem- it can be dealt with. That’s what I’m working on. Fear will always be there, but not in so much quantity. I have feared fear for too long. It’s time I took control of my own life, and stopped fearing possible futures and start living in the hear and now; take each day as it comes and ‘go with the flow’. I’m going to do all I can to stop letting fear take control. It’s going to be difficult, but I’m still going to try. I’m not going to let fear of failure stop me; becase if I do, then it has won again.

In short I’m going to keep myself distracted and busy, so I don’t have so much time to think about things. The more I think about things, the more opportunity fear has of setting in. I’m going to be more active, then I can tire myself. A tired body tends to be a calmer body; there isn’t so much energy for a full-on attack (plus, it would help me sleep better too). I’m going to allocate time to think about things and write all my worries down. This would stop me from worrying about everything all the time. When I feel Anxiety coming on, I’m going to immediately initiate the ‘breathe and distract’ technique so the fear can’t set in. I’m going to use Gradual Exposure/ Desensitization to gradually get myself used to Anxiety-provoking situations. The more I expose myself, the less Anxiety I’ll have each time.

I’m going to keep at it. Fear/ Anxiety has impacted on my life in a negative way for about eight years now. I’m not going to tolerate it so much anymore. I’m going to learn how to live with it so it no longer incapacitates me; so I am free to make decisions without so much hesitation, and so I can do what I want and need without the suffocatng fear that something bad might happen.

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